I'm done with Home Games...

The poker "revolution" is often discussed in terms of the boom of online poker, the re-emergence of poker rooms as focal points of brick and mortar casinos, as well as the multitude of poker-specific retail ventures...case in point: Pro Player Endurance Formula.

But one of the unitended consequences has been the downward trend of home games. These were once the bastion of poker. Six or seven guys in a dark room, smoking cigars and complaining about their wives or their Goomars ... or farther back, cowboys sitting around a table in a saloon, aces up their sleeves and ruffled whores draped on stairway railings watching every crooked pot get pushed. This was poker. Not Full Tilt or Foxwoods or WPT. But not anymore. And I for one, am REALLY glad.

I play mostly online. I am in a NL HE league, I have played in brick and mortars, but primarily it is online. Every now and then, I get invited to play with a decent group of guys in their "home game." It's usually a fun gathering complete with too many Bud Lights and various treats full of salty goodness. But unfortunately, it's also filled with things like "Black Mariah" and "Follow the Queen" and other bastardized versions of poker better played with buttons in mental institutions. Ordinarily, I just put up with it, and appreciate the good times the game offers.

That said, over the past few months, I have done my best to incorporate a few "real" poker games. First I started with Omaha. Then I really confused them with Omaha Hi/Lo. Heaven forbid...I attempted Razz. All were met with mixed receptions and expected poor play that I was happy to take care of. I just LOVE playing Razz when I keep getting called by a guy showing 10-K-9. Unfortunately all that changed in the last get-together.

A new guy joined us. You know the type. Fat. NY Yankees fan. Drives a Corvette. Is 39 and has a daughter. Loud. Drinks Coors Light. You know the type. In our dealer calls format, he called such gems as 7-27 and 3-5-7 ... good times. About two hours into the game, I called Omaha Hi/Lo. He shot me a confused look so I was happy to explain the rules and the other guys chimed in so he would understand. When we were done, he sat there and stared at us. I thought he just didn't understand. But no. He understood. His response?

"That is the stupidest game I have ever heard of. Why don't you just throw all the rules of poker out the window? I have never heard of that game and there isn't anyone that plays that game."

Sadly, I have to admit, he's right. I looked in the outline for Super System 3 and sure enough, the chapter on O E 8 has been replaced by one on 7-27.

My bad.

No more home games.

Unless there's ruffled whores involved.